For the first time in weeks – I’m sat here with the window open and I can actually feel the fresh air. Everyone has this dream on running in the sunshine but in reality it’s not that easy running in the heat.
13 years ago today my sister and I agreed to turn mum’s life support machine off. The surgeons said they could do some invasive surgery to try save the 10% that was still working – for us to see our mum in that position was just unimaginable – mum even put her lippy on to answer the phone.
I don’t want to dwell on the sadness of mum’s departure nor the heart break of the relationship before hand but instead I want to focus on the positives. I’ve learned life is just too short. I can’t ever sleep on an argument and tell my girls every morning that I love them.
People love to offer their opinions that things improve over time. I don’t think you ever get over losing your mum – especially when you never got the chance to have a good relationship and memories are sad ones. Living in the regret of what if and why. BUT you can learn from it. Learn to forgive; learn to come back stronger; learn to prioritise your energy. We all have our faults but words are like toothpaste – once they are out it’s very difficult to put them back where they came from.
No matter how I’m feeling – a run just makes it better. Gives me a break from my thoughts – brings me some calm. I hope I can continue to teach others to allow themselves to experience the euphoria of completing a run.
#sweat #wellness #oktonotbeok